i have to be strong. i have to tell about what it meant to lose my brother. it has always been hard to move on, thinking i would somehow leave him behind.
what hurts me the most is my siblings do not want to talk about him, as i he never existed. no one approaches me to say "when marcus... or i remember that marcus used to...", i mean, they do not even mention his name, like they never even knew him. and that hurts. because the people that knew who he was can not even mention his name. why do they not want to ever talk about him?
my mother says, not every one has dealt with their grief the same way. she said all of her children have come to her at one point and mentioned marcus, except for one sister alyce. she said everyone else has told her how much they have missed marcus and she has helped them cope.
i am trying to figure out how to cope with having lost him without talking about him, and i am finding it to be really difficult.
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bare self
- Chris and Faye
- Decatur, GA, United States
- we are beginning our life together as husband and wife and want to share our lives with those we love. thank you for coming along our journey :)
You need to talk about it. Yes everyone expresses their grief differently, and of course that is okay. Hang in there and remember that the love and connection you feel for your brother is as it should be. God does not want us to let go of our loved ones just because they have entered the next phase of life. He wants our love to be eternal.
ReplyDeleteI miss him too, Faye! I obviously never KNEW him like you KNEW him, but I remember being his dance partner at some church show in high school, the funny, brilliant things he would come out with out of nowhere, his amazing smile, how SHOCKED I was to be home from college visiting and learn that he had died, I mourn your loss, it must be terrible....and as a fellow soul who HATES when people won't talk about stuff, I feel ya
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